I fuss, I fight, I laugh very loud, I discover,I keep my feelings to myself until I decided to ruin the secrecy of telling the victim involved (lol) but mostly I love...gosh I do love hard.
While going through my timeline regarding blogs, photos and entries this evening I had misty eyes as I was going through a time. A time that I thought was chaotic to me then, but only seemed chaotic then. I was in my late teen years experiencing the first effects of what loving someone else was all about. Upon the first guy I've loved so dearly I re-discovered words and art. I don't want to flatter him much by associating him with praises but I am aware that one can rediscover present gift within themselves.
Although he added more fuel to my chaotic life that experience only made me a better girl. What? you're a better girl for getting your heart broken you may ask? Oh no a better girl because I am fully aware of my worth. I am aware of what I deserve. I am aiming to be somebody that somebody love and trust. To finish the thought of my memory lane ride it was clear to see that the guy was a muse well used then. As I am going through the pages of memories I can't help but laugh and smile at what once me smile. I used to be shattered by these memories when I thought of them. I no longer feel hunted by them. These memories of a girl who tried desperately to find herself is now lost in the time frame of the past and instead of crying my sorrow, I am able to laugh with joy.
I laugh and thank God because he has restored my joy. He has restored my heart, the fears of letting someone else in this mess of a heart. I thank him for making my restoration whole though the scars of my healing wombs are present. The faded scars are only present to show that I've survived. I've had so much restoration with time that I remembered falling in love again.
While going through my timeline regarding blogs, photos and entries this evening I had misty eyes as I was going through a time. A time that I thought was chaotic to me then, but only seemed chaotic then. I was in my late teen years experiencing the first effects of what loving someone else was all about. Upon the first guy I've loved so dearly I re-discovered words and art. I don't want to flatter him much by associating him with praises but I am aware that one can rediscover present gift within themselves.
Although he added more fuel to my chaotic life that experience only made me a better girl. What? you're a better girl for getting your heart broken you may ask? Oh no a better girl because I am fully aware of my worth. I am aware of what I deserve. I am aiming to be somebody that somebody love and trust. To finish the thought of my memory lane ride it was clear to see that the guy was a muse well used then. As I am going through the pages of memories I can't help but laugh and smile at what once me smile. I used to be shattered by these memories when I thought of them. I no longer feel hunted by them. These memories of a girl who tried desperately to find herself is now lost in the time frame of the past and instead of crying my sorrow, I am able to laugh with joy.I laugh and thank God because he has restored my joy. He has restored my heart, the fears of letting someone else in this mess of a heart. I thank him for making my restoration whole though the scars of my healing wombs are present. The faded scars are only present to show that I've survived. I've had so much restoration with time that I remembered falling in love again.
It’s good to know that my surviving heart was able to love again.
It's All Love
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